Chuck Norris can build a Water Dam... In the Sahara Desert.
Three fans were bemoaning the sorry state of their football team. "I blame the general manager," said the first fan. "If he signed better players, we'd be a great team." "I blame the players," said the second fan. "If they made more of an effort, we'd score some points." "I blame my parents," said the third. "If I'd been born in Seattle, I'd be supporting a decent team."
Q: What do you call a terrorist attack in the Middle East? A: A Selfie!
Yo moma so fat she jumped off the Grand Canon and got stuck.
What kind of cows do you find in Alaska? Eski-moos.
Q: What do u call 1,000 black people on a plane back to Africa? A: A good start.
Scientis cannot figure out where Atlantis is... Chuck Norris owns a villa there.
In what state will you find the most cows? Moo York.
Teacher: Shamu, go to the map and find North America. Shamu: Here it is! Teacher: Correct. Now, Ramu, who discovered America? Ramu: Shamu!
At a poor-side of Athens, a kid were on the street and was playing. A cop who was crossing around that street, saw him and asked him: "What are you doing there kiddo?" "I’m playing..." "What are you playing?" "Oh, well... I collect sand, I pour some water in and I add then some poop and I’m making little weaklings!" "What kind of weaklings?" "Cops..." The cop, furious, slaps the kid and screams: "Get the hell away from here and run to your house! I never wanna see you wondering around here." For the next two days, the kid didn’t show up. The third day, the kid was on the same spot, playing. The cop, saw him again and approached the kid. "What are you doing there?" "I’m playing..." "What?" "Oh, well... I collect sand, then pour some water in and I’m making little weaklings." "Congratulations! enthusiastic said the cop. And what kind of weaklings you’re making there?" "Firefighters...!" "So, how come you’re not putting any poop on them as well?" "Cause, whenever I do, they come out cops...!"