Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
Vote:
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
Chuck Norris once went to court for a crime, the judge pleaded guilty.
Vote:
Lawsuit commercials for personal injury are quite common with things like accidents and medication; however they never mention Chuck Norris.
Vote:
One day, a priest was walking through a forest, when he came upon a pond.
On the pond was a lily-pad, and on the lily-pad was the saddest frog the priest had ever seen!
"Dear frog" the priest asked, "what is the matter? Why re you so sad?"
"Well," said the frog, "I was not always a frog."
"Tell me more" said the priest.
"One day, I was waslking through these woods when I came upon a wicked witch. 'Stand aside witch' I said to her. But alas, she called me a nasty cheeky boy and turned me into a frog."
"But that's terrible! Isn't there anything that can be done to reverse the spell?" asked the priest.
"Well" said the frog, "if a kind person were to take me home for the night, feed me and put me to sleep on their pillow, I am sure I would wake up human again."
"Well, this is your lucky day!" said the priest.
So he took the frog home, fed him and put him to sleep on his pillow. And lo and behold, when he woke up the next morning, there was a 10 year old choir boy in his bead!
"And that Your Honour, is the case for the Defence!"
Chuck Norris recently got himself an iPad.
It turned into iDust when he tried to use it.
Vote:
Chuck Norris keeps a list of all his victims, it's called the phone book.
Vote:
Crest fights cavities, Chuck Norris kills them.
Vote:
The reason Waldo hides is because he saw Chuck Norris looking for him.
Vote:
A Harvard and Yale Law grad met in a washroom during a law convention.
The Harvard graduate said, "Didn't they teach you to wash your hands at Yale?"
The Yale grad responded, "They taught us not to piss on our hands."
Q: What is the ideal weight of a lawyer?
A: About three pounds, including the urn.