If Chuck Norris says his opinion on somthing, it automaticlly becomes a fact.
Fear of Chuck Norris is called logic.
Chuck Norris can't fly, gravity just looks the other way when he leaves the ground.
When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You will score a 1600.
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is not cool. By saying that, I have decreased my life to 5 seco...
Chuck Norris knows how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop.
Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.
Chuck Norris has no need for a TV remote. He stares at his television, until it changes the channel.