Chuck Norris doesn't Tivo television programs.
They come on when HE wants them to.
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Dante's Inferno is based on a Nature Walk Chuck Norris once took.
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Chuck Norris once won a Poker tournament using only Pokemon cards.
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Chuck Norris takes care of his guardian angel.
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Chuck Norris is so powerful that when he goes fishing, the fish are so scared they drown.
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What does the fox say?
Whatever the hell Chuck Norris tells him to.
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Chuck Norris uses black holes to clean his dishes.
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They said that a picture is worth a 1000 words, a picture of Chuck Norris is worth a 1000 ways to die.
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If Chuck Norris were a substance, he would abuse you.
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Bruce Springsteen calls Chuck Norris 'The Boss'.
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There are no comets.
Only people that Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked so hard that they are now in permanent orbit in our solar system.
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