Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it.
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Q. What's green and red?
A. A very mad frog.
Q: Why did the fat turkey cross the road?
A: To get hit by my car.
Three rabbits escape from a testing lab and find an entire field full of carrots.
They eat themselves into a stupor and sleep throughout the night.
The next morning, they find an entire field full of female rabbits with no males in sight.
They screw themselves into a stupor and sleep throughout the night.
The next morning, the rabbits get to talking.
"I'm gonna go back to that field of carrots," says one.
"I'm gonna go back to those cute little rabbits," says the second.
"I'm going back to the lab," says the third. "I'm dying for a cigarette."
Q: What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
A: I want to hold your hand hand hand hand hand hand hand hand.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with an elephant?
An elephant who never forgets to eat his carrots.
What do you call it when one rabbit challenges another rabbit to hop across a forty-yard canyon?
A hare dare.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
You don't because it won't come.
Two fish swim into a concrete wall.
One turns to the other and says: "Dam"
Q: Why does a squirrle swim on its back?
A: To keep its nuts dry