What do you call a lion wearing a cravat and a flower in its mane? A dandy lion.
Q: Why did the atheist throw her watch out the window? A: She wanted to see if it was designed intelligently enough to evolve into a bird.
So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says ''Your eyes sparkle like diamonds''. I said, ''Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck'
What's a rabbits favorite song? "Hoppy Birthday to You."
What do you get if you cross a hippo, elephant and a rhino? A Helephino!!
How do you make a small fortune out of horses? Start off with a large fortune!
Why do zebras have stripes? Because the spots where all over.
What do you call a flying skunk? A smellicopter.
There once was a baby elephant and a baby turtle drinking from a river deep in the jungle. For no reason, the turtle reaches over and bites the elephant's tail, really hard. Years and years later, the same elephant, now grown up, is by the same river, having a drink with his giraffe buddy, when the same turtle that bit him on the tail all those years ago wanders up to the river. The elephant rears back a leg and kicks the turtle as hard as he can, sending him flying way off into the jungle. "Why did you do that?" the giraffe asks. "When we both were babies, that turtle bit my tail for no reason," the elephant replied. "Wow! You must have a good memory!" exclaimed the giraffe. "Yep!" said the elephant. "I've got Turtle-Recall."
What is the definition of "moon"? The past tense of "moo"!
What are the most athletic rodents? Track and field mice.