What was the name of the film about a killer lion that swam underwater?
Claws.
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Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'"
Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken."
Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?"
Mother: "Because we need the eggs."
‘Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in?
I think that’s how dogs spend their lives.’
Sue Murphy
Why is it that if you give a child an encyclopedia, lawyer is always the third thing they look up?
Because the first thing a child looks up is dog.
The second is snake.
And under snake, the encyclopedia says See Lawyer.
A baby hedgehog lost itself, in the garden.
Sad, he strolls from here to there, whereupon he bumps in a cactus and full of hope he says:
Mama, is that you?
A bumble bee was chasing a rabbit.
Finally the bee turned around and flew away.
Why?
The rabbit had two b's already.
You said this horse could jump as high as a ten foot fence and he can't jump at all.
Well neither can a fence!
Q: Why does a dog lick himself?
A: He can't make a fist.
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What do you do when two snails have a fight?
Leave them to slug it out.
Q: What did the bird say after his cage fell apart?
A: "Cheap, cheap!"
Sharks watch Chuck Norris week.
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