Joke #10717

What's the favourite flavour of sharks? Shark-o-late.
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal

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Chuck Norris once uppercut a horse and that is how the giraffe was created.
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has 52.38 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
I had to get rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.
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has 78.01 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: animal, husband
A Guy goes into a bar with his pet octopus and says, "I bet $50 that no one here has a musical instrument that this octopus can't play." The people in the bar look around and someone fetches out an old guitar. The octopus has a look, picks it up, tunes up the strings and starts playing the guitar. The octopus' owner pockets the fifty bucks. The next guy comes up with a trumpet, octopus takes the horn, loosens up the keys, licks it's lips and starts playing a jazz solo. The guy hands over another fifty bucks to the octopus' owner. The bar owner has been watching all this and disappears out back, coming back a few moments later with a set of bagpipes under his arm. He puts them on the bar and says to the guy, "Now if your octopus can play that I'll give you a hundred dollars." The octopus takes a look at the bagpipes, lifts it up, turns it over, and has another look from a different angle. Puzzled, the octopus' owner comes up and says, "What are you pissing around for? Hurry up and play the damn thing!" The octopus says, "Play it? If I can figure out how to get it's pajama's off, I'm gonna screw it!"
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has 63.65 % from 117 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, disgusting, money, music
A guy walks into a bar with a giraffe, and the giraffe gets waay too drunk. The bartender says, "Hey! you can't leave that lyin' there!" The guy goes, "that's not a lion its a giraffe!"
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has 59.75 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender, drunk
Why is manna from heaven like horse hay? Both are food from aloft!
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has 34.13 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, heaven
Two drunks had just gotten thrown out of the bar and are walking down the street when they come across this dog, sitting on the curb, licking his balls. They stand there watching and after a while one of them says, " I sure wish I could do that!" The other one looks at him and says, "Well, I think I'd pet him first".
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has 27.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, dog, drunk
When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.
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has 36.23 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, Chuck Norris
Q: What will a giraffe do, if you spit in its face? A: It will kick off your ladder…
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has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal
Two men were walking through the woods when a large bear walked out into the clearing not more than fifty feet from them. The first man dropped his backpack and dug out a pair of running shoes. Then, as the bear slowly approached them, he furiously attempted to lace them up. The second man, somewhat confused, looked at the first man and said, "Whaddya doing? Running shoes ain’t gonna help! You can't outrun that there bear!" "I don't need to outrun the bear, buddy," said the first man, "I just need to outrun you."
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has 67.81 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you get if you cross a steer and a chicken? Roost beef.
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, food