Chuck Norris lights campfires with fire ants.
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The Grinch steals Christmas from Santa, Chuck Norris steals Christmas from the Grinch.
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Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
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Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
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Before god said, "Let there be light," he asked Chuck Norris,"Can light let there be?"
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When Light wrote Chuck Norris' name in the Death Note, the book died.
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The reason Chuck Norris has never been a doctor on House is because, he would find the diagnosis in one second.
It'd always be Norris Anger Disease.
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Justin Beiber screeched like a high-pitched girl the time he saw Chuck Norris.
His voice is still up there today.
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Chuck Norris can stab a knife with a man.
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Chuck Norris has 2 kids.
We know them as Pain and Suffering.
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When Chuck Norris goes to the cinema, he changes the movies with his remote control.
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