Joke #11091

Why did the bareback performer ride his horse? Because it got too heavy to carry.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal

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What do you call an owl magician? HOOOOOdini.
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A stranger was seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the stranger turned to the Little Johnny and said, "Let's talk. I've heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger." Little Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said to the stranger, "What would you like to discuss?" "Oh, I don't know," said the stranger. "How about nuclear power?" "OK," said Little Johnny. "That could be an interesting topic.But let me ask you a question first." "A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat grass. The same stuff. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?" "Jeez," said the stranger. "I have no idea." "Well, then," said Little Johnny, "How is it that you feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know shit?"
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has 85.25 % from 1837 votes. More jokes about: animal, little Johnny, stupid
Why are there no zebras in Czech zoos? Czechs and stripes don’t mix.
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has 48.02 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
Why does a chicken lay eggs? Because if she dropped them, they’d break.
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has 65.80 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Q: Why was the Easter Bunny so upset? A: He was having a bad hare day!
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has 57.49 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: animal, easter
What four animals does a woman like to have in her house? A tiger in bed, a mink in her closet, a jaguar in her garage and a jackass to pay for it all.
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has 82.07 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: animal, car, mean, money, women
What's a cow's favorite moosical note? Beef-flat!
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has 56.98 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, music
A man had a party where all the rich people attend. And the he had a pool with alligators. So he announced that anyone who will swim across this pool and come out alive will be granted three wishes. But no one wanted to go for the challenge. All of a sudden, there was a big splash and a man was swimming like a hell and came out alive. So the host asked, "What are your three wishes?" The man replied, "Give me the shotgun and bulllets and show me the idiot that pushed me in..."
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has 73.20 % from 89 votes. More jokes about: animal, men, party
Q: What do women and cats have in common? A: Pussy farts.
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has 39.56 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, fart, women
Late one night, a burglar broke into a house that he thought was empty. He tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a loud voice say: "Jesus is watching you!" Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward again. "Jesus is watching you," the voice boomed again. The burglar stopped again. He was frightened. Frantically, he looked all around. In a dark corner, he spotted a bird cage and in the cage was a parrot. The burglar breathed a sigh of relief, then he asked the parrot: "What's your name?" "Clarence," said the bird. "That's a dumb name for a parrot," sneered the burglar. "What idiot named you Clarence?" The parrot said, "The same idiot who named the Rottweiller, Jesus."
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has 78.34 % from 196 votes. More jokes about: animal, parrot