Chuck Norris can punch your thoughts and give you a headache.
A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a License to drive a car... The car needs a special license to be driven by Chuck Norris.
Motley Crue released a new song called "Roundhouse Kickstart My Heart" dedicated to Chuck Norris. It will be number one in the top 40 forever.
Chuck Norris doesn't Tivo television programs. They come on when HE wants them to.
Scientists believe that a giant meteor killed off the dinosaurs. This is true, if you can consider Chuck Norris to be a giant meteor.
AIDS Can't Kill Chuck Norris.
Where does the devil go when he dies? He goes to Chuck Norris for an eternity of roundhouse kicks.
Chuck Norris once encountered the men in black and he still remembers it.
Columbus may have discovered America, but after a conversation with Chuck Norris it was decided, Chuck Norris discovered America.
While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.