Q: Why did the hipster float down the tributary?
A: Because the river was too mainstream.
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Q: Why do hipsters love using the subway?
A: Because its underground.
Q: How many hipsters does it take to flush a toilet?
A: You can't touch that toilet, it's art.
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Q: What's a hipster's favorite profession?
A: Mortician. All of his work is 6 feet underground.
Q: Why do hipsters love ice?
A: Because ice was water before it was cool.
Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Dude, the light bulb was cooler before it changed.
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Q: You know what would make America great again?
A: If we kept the Mexicans and deported the hipsters.
Q: Why did the hipster leave his oceanside mansion?
A: It was too current.
Kind of surprised hipsters haven't started tying their beard's in man buns yet.
Q: Why did the hipster burn his tongue?
A: Because he ate his food before it was cool.