Joke #12001

It was Valentine's day and Jim and Danielle's first date. They sat in the darkened cinema waiting for the film to start. The screen finally lit up with a flashy advertisement for the cinema's concession stand. Jim and Danielle realised that there was no sound. The film began but the silence continued. Suddenly, out of the darkness, an irritated voice in the crowd loudly shouted, "Okay, who's got the remote control?"

A guy tells his friends: The girl I was dating broke my heart, so I broke her Apple iPhone 5. You all know who cried more

Q: Why do C# programmers have trouble dating women? A: They want women with class, but they treat them like objects.

I just love to do special things for my wife on Valentine's day. Like open the door for her when she puts all the laundry in the washing machine, or plug and unplug the vacuum as she moves from room to room cleaning. Guys, it's these little thoughtful things you can do to have a marriage such as mine.

A failure in a device will never appear until it has passed final inspection.

Q: Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? A: It went OK.

Two friends talk: "Hi, what are you doing?" "Not much, writing a Valentine's Day greeting card." "Why are you writing it with your left hand? Are you left-handed?" "No, I just can't let my right hand to see it. It's a surprise for it."

Baby, if you were an iPhone 6, I would tap you all day!

The most effective way to remember to buy something to your wife for St. Valentine's Day is... to forget it once!

Chuck Norris can install a 64 bit OS on 32 bit machines.

A young woman was taking an afternoon nap. After she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's Day. "What do you think it means?" "You'll know tonight," he said. That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it, only to find a book entitled "The Meaning of Dreams."