Joke #1318

Dating a stripper is like eating a noisy bag of chips in church... everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down inside they want some too.
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has 79.12 % from 209 votes. More jokes about: church, dating, dirty

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A young man and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town. They were about to have sex when the girl stopped. “I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I’m actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex.” The man reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing. After a cigarette, the man just sat in the driver’s seat looking out the window. “Why aren’t we going anywhere?” asked the girl. “Well, I should have mentioned this before, but I’m actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25…”
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has 85.04 % from 2056 votes. More jokes about: dating, dirty, money, sex
I see you ordered the most expensive item on the menu for our first date. I hope you realize that it comes with a side order of my dick.
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has 60.67 % from 130 votes. More jokes about: dating, dirty
A sexology professor announced that if any man over 50 eats 2 or 3 dates with a raw garlic clove he never fails in sex problems. This prescription makes his dick strong and heathy. There is only one side effect. That diet causes he blows many farts daily!
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has 60.07 % from 287 votes. More jokes about: dating, dirty, disgusting, fart, sex
Wanna go on an 'ate' with me? I'll give you the 'D' later.
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has 50.97 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: dating, dirty, flirt, food, sex
Q: Who did little Johnny see when he snuck into the church late one night? A: Pastor Bedtime.
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has 37.29 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: church, dirty, little Johnny, sex
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she thought the international dateline was a global dating service.
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has 58.98 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: dating, insulting, stupid, Yo mama
One morning I called my girlfriend and his father picked "Hello who are you?" I heard that heavy voice and quickly replied a while "hey Eric where are you the choir is about to begin?" "What choir?" he asked. "Come on Eric stop kidding around and get your ass over here" the father then replied "Sorry am not Eric and I don't know what you are talking about I am dr Stephen" he said. I then said "oh sorry I must have misdialled" I then hang up and decided I am never gonna call that girl again...
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has 21.01 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: church, communication, dad, phone, relationship
A woman starts dating a doctor. Before too long, she becomes pregnant and they don't know what to do. About nine months later, just about the time she is going to give birth, a priest goes into the hospital for a prostate gland infection. The doctor says to the woman, "I know what we'll do. After I've operated on the priest, I'll give the baby to him and tell him it was a miracle." "Do you think it will work?" she asks. "It's worth a try." he says. So, the doctor delivers the baby and then operates on the priest. After the operation he goes in to the priest and says, "Father, you're not going to believe this.". "What?" asks the priest, "what happened?". "You gave birth to a child!". "But that's impossible!" says the priest. "I just did the operation," insists the doctor, "It's a miracle! Here's your baby." About fifteen years go by, and the priest realises he must tell his son the truth. One day, he sits the boy down and says, "Son, I have something to tell you. I'm not your father." The son says, "What do you mean, you're not my father?" The priest replies, "I am your mother, the archbishop is your father."
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has 77.11 % from 100 votes. More jokes about: baby, dating, doctor, kids, women
A guy has a bad habit: He loves to hit pedestrians while he drives. So one day he's driving andsees an old lady with a cane and he decides to control his urge to swerve and hit her but he can't. Later, he sees a kid skating and can't resist hitting the kid. Finally, he decides he needs help from above so he goes to a church and asks the pastor for help. So after church, the pastor invites him to his house for lunch. They get in the car and start to drive down the street, and just as he starts to tell the pastor about his problem, he sees an old blind man walking down the street. He swerves toward him but misses, and the pastor says, "Don't worry. I got him with the door!"
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has 71.59 % from 108 votes. More jokes about: black humor, car, church, kids, love
Don't let worry kill you - let the church help.
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has 55.78 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: atheist, church, death