Knock Knock!
Who's There?
Figs
Figs who?
Figs the doorbell, it's broken!
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Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Justin
Justin who?
Justin time for dinner!
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Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Zany
Zany who?
Zany body home?
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Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Owls say.
Owls say who?
Yep, that they do.
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One night, there was a knock on my door...
i open it and no one was there every night I would get the same knock and still no one was there...
Untill the morning I was just making myself some tea as a person knocks on my door it was a black man he walk in and stole my tea ....
i said to myself did he just mug me ....
I still didn't know who was knocking on the doors at night
Untill one night I opened my door and there was a floating mug I was still confused.
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Two alligators are sitting on the edge of a swamp.
The small one turns to the big one and says; I don't understand how you can be so much bigger than me.
We're the same age, we were the same size as kids... I just don't get it."
"Well," says the big alligator, "what have you been eating?"
"Lawyers, same as you," replies the small alligator.
"Hm. Well, where do you catch 'em?"
"Down at that law firm on the edge of the swamp."
"Same here.
Hm.
How do you catch 'em?"
"Well, I crawl under a BMW and wait for someone to unlock the door.
Then I jump out, bite 'em, shake the shit out of 'em, and eat 'em!"
"Ah!" says the big alligator, "I think I see your problem.
See, by the time you get done shakin' the shit out of a lawyer, there's nothing left but lips and a briefcase..."
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Yah!
Yah who?
Naaah, bro, I prefer google.
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In the supermarket was a man pushing a cart which contained a screaming, bellowing baby.
The gentleman kept repeating softly, “Don’t get excited, Albert; don’t scream, Albert; don’t yell, Albert; keep calm, Albert.”
A woman standing next to him said, “You certainly are to be commended for trying to soothe your son, Albert.”
The man looked at her and said, “Lady, I’m Albert.”
Q: What does a nosey pepper do?
A: Gets jalapeno business!
"Have you heard my knock-knock joke?" asked the blonde.
"No," said the brunette.
"Okay," said the blonde, "you start."
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Knock Knock
Who's there!
B-4!
B-4 who?
B-4 you take the diploma, shake the dean's hand.
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