How does a frog confuse you? When he comes out and says he needed that nap and feels much better.
A dog with three legs walks into a Wild West bar and says, ‘I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.’
Zebras are just horses that escaped from prison.
You can lead a horse to water, but Chuck Norris can make it drink.
Why did the dolphin feel crabby? Because he ate too many crabs.
Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground.The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts. Finally, the female bird turned to her mate. “Dear,” she chirped, “I think it’s time to tell him he’s adopted.”
Did you hear about the cannibal spider that ate his uncle's wife? He was an aunteater.
"Did you hear about the farmer who lost control of his tractor in the cow pasture?" "No." "Did he hurt the cows?" "No, he just grazed them."
Sharks watch Chuck Norris week.
Q: Where did the newlywed horses stay? A: In the bridle suite.
I once had a goldfish that could break-dance on a carpet, but only for like 20 seconds.