Who is little, black and jumps? A flee! But who’s big, black and jumps? Dr. Alban!
The matchmaker approached a single woman and told her he had a husband for her. “I’m ashamed to bring this up,” he said, “but the man wants to be sure you are compatible in bed. He wants, he says, a sample.” The woman was shocked. “Such a thing you ask a Christian virtuous woman? Such a crude person would suggest such a thing? He must be a barnyard animal, not a gentleman.” The matchmaker, trying to earn a fee, said, “He’s a pragmatic, man. After all, to him it’s not a big deal… just a sample.” She thought a minute. “A pragmatic man, is he? So tell him I don’t give samples. I can give him 50 or 60 references, if he wants, though.
A mother was arguing with her teenager and finally she reaches breaking point and blurts out, " I should swallowed you when i had the chance!"
What is the difference between mayonnaise and semen? Mayonnaise doesn't shoot down your throat at 40 miles per hour.
A woman wants everything from one man. A man wants one thing from all the women.
A teenage girl come home from school and asks her mother, "Is it true what Rita just told me?" "What's that?" asks her mother. "That babies come out of the same place where boys put their penises?" said her daughter. "Yes it is dear!" replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and that she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter. "But then, when I have a baby," responded the teenager, "won't it knock my teeth out?"
A guy's talking to a girl in a bar. He says, "What's your name?" She says, "Carmen." He says, "That's a nice name. Who named you, your mother?" She says, "No, I named myself." He says, "Why Carmen?" She says, "Because I like cars and I like men. What's your name?" He says, "Beerfuck."
4 reasons why I curse 1) Because I fucking want to. 2) Because I fucking can. 3) Because I don't give a fuck. 4) Because my mom isn't around.
Q: How do you keep black youth off the streets? A: Put a KFC on the sidewalk
I like your style I like your class but most of all i like your ass.
A woman walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist if he sells size extra large condoms. He replies, "Yes we do. Would you like to buy some?" She responds, "No sir, but do you mind if I wait around here until someone does?"