A tourist was drowning in the sea: Help! Help! He screams. Very calm the fisherman says: Press F1 already and stop screaming. You’re scaring the fishes away.
I would actually use Siri if the voice sounded like Morgan Freeman.
The mouse is referred to as a ‘little bugger’.
Your mom is so stupid she tried to drown a fish.
Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says: "Dam"
Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
My ex girlfriend has a tattoo of a shell on her inner thigh. If you put your ear up to it... you can smell the ocean.
What did the psychiatrist say to the android kleptomaniac? DON'T keep taking the tablets!
If they bring shrimp home on shrimp boats, fish home on fish boats, and clams home on clam boats, what do they bring crabs home on? The Captains Dinghy!
Steve Jobs was an amazing man. He will live in my hard drive forever!
Home is where the wifi connects automatically.