Joke #2641

Two NBA basketball referees were walking through the countryside and they noticed some tracks. The first said, "Deer tracks?" "No," replied the second, "Bear tracks." The conversation ended abruptly when the train hit them.

Q: What do you get when you combine a Starbucks and Yoga class? A: I don't know, but there's probably a hipster close by.

A retiree was given a set of golf clubs by his co-workers. Thinking he'd try the game, he asked the local pro for lessons, explaining that he knew nothing whatever of the game. The pro showed him the stance and swing, then said, "Just hit the ball toward the flag on the first green." The novice teed up and smacked the ball straight down the fairway and onto the green, where it stopped inches from the hole. "Now what?" the fellow asked the speechless pro. "Uh... you're supposed to hit the ball into the cup," the pro finally said, after he was able to speak again. "Oh great! NOW you tell me." said the beginner.

What are the most athletic rodents? Track and field mice.

A true story, according to the LA Times..... Coach Frank Layden of the Utah Jazz asked forward Jeff Wilkins, "Is your bad play due to ignorance or apathy?" Wilkins replied, "I don't know and I don't care!"

Golfer: "I'd move heaven & earth to break 100 on this course." Caddy: "Try heaven; you've already moved most of the earth."

A rookie pitcher was struggling at the mound, so the catcher walked up to have a talk with him. "I've figured out your problem," he told the young southpaw. "You always lose control at the same point in every game." "When is that?" "Right after the National Anthem."

The water in Rio is so bad that even Usain Bolt had the "runs" in his last race!

Micheal Jordan to Chuck Norris: I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours. Can you? Chuck Norris: (laughs) How do you think the earth spins?

An amateur golfer is one who addresses the ball twice: once before swinging, and once again after swinging.

Chuck Norris won gold for sitting in the crowd at the olympics.