Who may open the door without using hands, nor legs? An invalid. 
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Similar jokes
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"I want a divorce"!
"But you made a vow in the church that we remain together till death do us part."
"I guess you are right. Very well, go ahead and drink up the tea I made for you."
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What's the difference betwee Elton John and Princess Diana ?
One's composing, the other is decomposing.
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Q: What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
A: With a knife.
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How did the dentist become a brain surgeon?
His hand slipped.
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Chuck Norris has travelled many places and seen many faces.
So too has his boot.
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I'm going to celebrate Halloween the same way I always do... by murdering a bunch of teens by the lake.
Sincerely, Michael Myers
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An Asian walks into a McDonald's and says, "I'll Have An Eggroll and Some Fry Rye."
"I'm sorry sir we don't serve that. Would you like anything else?"
"I have quarter pounder. And when would you like to pick that up...Hiroshima!"
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A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island.
After one month the woman says:
"I can not proceed in this way."
And she suicides herself. After another month, the sailors say:
"We can not proceed in this way."
And they bury the woman. The next month, the sailors say:
"We can not proceed in this way."
And they dig up the woman.
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What do u call a black priest?
Holy shit.
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