Joke #2830

Our folk not only knows how to read between the lines but also how to leave a record between the eyes.

The cowboy was trying to buy a health insurance policy. The insurance agent was going down the list of standard questions. "Ever have an accident?" "Nope, nary a one." "None? You've never had any accidents." "Nope. Ain't had one. Never." "Well, you said in this form you were bitten by a snake once. Wouldn't you consider that an accident?" "Heck, no. That dang varmint bit me on purpose."

"Today, I saw a homeless men living in a tyre. So I did good deed and punctured it." "How is that a good deed?" "He is now living in a flat."

I know when god becomes angry. When teenage girls get pregnant and their parents exclaim, "Oh god! What have you done?!"

Patient: "May I have a glass of water, doctor." Doctor: "Are you thirsty?" Patient: "No… I just wanted to check whether my throat leaks."

Q: There is a $100 bill sitting in the middle of a 4 way intersection, at one side there is a man hating dike, at another side, there is Santa, at another side there is the Easter Bunny, and at the las side there is a man loving lesbian. Who gets the $100 bill? A: The man hating dike because all others are a figure of your imagination.

How do you describe an angry potato? Boiling Mad.

Q: What is the worst thing an emergency doctor can tell you after admitting your MIL? A: Sir, we were able to save her!

Chuck Norris was born in a house he build himself.

Bruce Lee didn't die from an allergic reaction. He died cause Chuck Norris decided to not let him live anymore.

I read that India launched a rocket to Mars the other day. That seems like a strange place to put a call center.