Make the world your playground.
Whenever you miss the sandbox, cover it up.
Dragging a sock over it helps.
If you can't get your way, lay across the keyboard till you do.
When you are hungry, meow loudly so they feed you just to shut you up.
Always find a good patch of sun to nap in.
Nap often.
When in trouble, just purr and look cute.
Life is hard, and then you nap.
Curiosity never killed anything except maybe a few hours.
Variety is the spice of life.
One day, ignore people; the next day, annoy them, and play with them when they're busy.
Climb your way to the top, that's why the curtains are there.
Make your mark in the world, or at least spray in each corner.
Always give generously; a bird or rodent left on the bed tells them, "I care".
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris.
After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.
Vote:
Q: Why do beavers spend a fortune on the Internet?
A: They never want to log off.
If it walks like a duck, talks lidek a duck, and smell like a duck but Chuck Norris says it's a girrafe. It's a damn girrafe!
Vote:
Question: Why does Tigger smell?
Answer: You'd smell too if you played with Pooh all day!
What do ducks wear to party's?
A duck-sedo!
Yo' Mama is so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct.
Teacher: Billy, how do you spell "Crocodile"?
Billy: ‘K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
Teacher: No, that's wrong
Billy: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!
Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
Vote:
What did the customer say to the pet shop assistant after buying a bunny?
Rabbit up nicely, it's a gift.
Vote: