Q: Why do Blondes have TGIF written on their shoes? A: Toes Go In First.
On the first day of training for parachute jumping, a blonde listened intently to the instructor. He told them to start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet. The blonde asked, “How am I supposed to know when I’m at 300 feet?” “That’s a good question. When you get to 300 feet, you can recognize the faces of people on the ground.” After pondering his answer, she asked, “What happens if there’s no one there I know?”
Most men regard blondes as a golden opportunity.
Once a blonde went to the library to get a book. A few days later, she returns and says to librarian at the counter, "This book was very boring. It had too many characters and too many numbers, so i would like to return it." The librarian says to the other librarian, "So here is the person who took our phone book!"
3 girls step on a magic rug that makes u disappear if u tell a lie. Brunette: I think I'm the prettiest girl in school. *poof* Red-head: I think I'm the most popular girl in school. *poof* Blonde: I think-. *poof*
Q: What did the blonde say when she was offered a position at the UN? A: Would that be a "missionary position?"
This blonde goes into the drugstore looking for a birthday card. She asks the clerk if they have any new and different cards — something unusual. The clerk points her to a new card just in that day — “Happy Birthday to the Boy who Popped My Cherry.” The blonde replied, “How cool! I’ll take the whole box!”
Q: How are blondes like postage stamps? A: You lick'm, stick'em, and send'em on their way.
A road construction manager needed to hire someone to paint the yellow lines down the middle of a newly constructed road. A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all get hired. They are each assigned a section of the road. The first day, the blonde paints 2 miles, the redhead 1.5, and the brunette only 1. On the second day, the blonde paints 1 mile, the brunette 2, and the redheaed 2.5. On the third day, the blonde only gets 1/4 of a mile done, the redheaed 3, and the brunette 3.5. The manager decides to talk to the blonde. "You haven't been painting as much road as you did on the first day," the manager said. "What's the problem?" "I'd be painting more, but the bucket keeps getting farther and farther away!"
Q. Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink? A. Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!
Q. What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10? A. She picks up her purse and goes home.