What’s funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby in a clown costume!
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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall red?
Depends how hard you throw them.
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What's worse than 11 dead babies stapled to a tree?
1 dead baby stapled to 11 trees.
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How many babies does it take to paint a house?
Depends how hard you throw them.
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What's better than 10 dead babies in 1 bag?
1 dead baby in 10 bags.
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How do you make a dead baby float?
Take your foot off of it’s head.
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What's the difference between a dead baby and a table?
You can't fuck a table.
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What is the differance between a dead baby and a VHS tape?
The VHS tape don't stink when you leave it out in the sun.
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What’s the difference between a dead baby and an onion.
You don’t cry when you chop up a dead baby.
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What is special about a dead baby over all other forms of life?
You can achieve deep throat from whichever way you enter.
A guy is late to meet with his friends at the local bar the friends obviously ask why he is late and he responds:
"Wow, you won't believe what just happened. So I take the usual route via the rail tracks and suddenly I see a young, naked woman tied up next to the tracks."
The friends are curious and ask: "Well, what happened next?"
The guy says: "Of course I untied her and we had sex because I freed her."
The friends are cheering and one friend asks: "Soo... did you get any head?"
The guy says: "No, I couldn't find it..."
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