Joke #3370

How can you tell that elephants have been doing it in your garage? All your Hefty Bags are missing.
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: animal

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My tomcat used to stay out all night, so I took him to the vet and had him neutered. Now he still stays out all night – it turns out he likes to watch!
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
Bert took his Saint Bernard to the vet. "Doctor," he said sadly, "I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to cut off my dog's tail." The vet stepped back, "Bert, why should I do such a terrible thing?" "Because my mother-in-law's arriving tomorrow, and I don't want anything to make her think she's welcome."
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has 71.29 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: animal, doctor, mother in law
Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house everyone felt shitty even the mouse. Mom at the whorehouse and dad smoking grass, I settled down for a nice piece of ass. When all of a sudden I heard such a clatter, I sprung from my place to see what was the matter. When out on the lawn I saw a big dick, I new in a moment it must be Saint Nick. He came down the chimney like a bat out of hell, I knew in a moment the f*cker had fell. He filled all of our stockings with pretzels and beer and a big rubber dick for my brother the queer. He rose up the chimney with a thunderous fart, the son of a b*tch tore the chimney apart. He swore and he cursed as he flew out of sight, "piss on you all and have a hell of a night."
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has 65.40 % from 296 votes. More jokes about: animal, Christmas, dirty, fart
Q: What do dogs do after they finish obedience school? A: They get their masters.
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has 71.53 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, school
What was the name of the film about a killer lion that swam underwater? Claws.
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has 60.15 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What's invisible and smells like carrots? A: Bunny farts!
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has 42.61 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
What South American dance do cows like to do? The Rump-a.
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has 46.20 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, music
What's a rabbits favorite TV show? Hoppy Days.
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has 44.92 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
What would you hear at a cow concert? Moo-sic!
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has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, music
How are skunks able to avoid danger? By using their instinks and common scents.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal