Two men have been sitting out on a lake all day long, ice fishing.
One has been having no luck at all and the other has been pulling fish after fish out of his hole in the ice.
The man having no luck finally leans over and asks the other what his secrect is.
"mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm."
"I'm sorry, what did you say?"
"mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm."
"I'm sorry, I still didn't understand you."
The successful man spits something into his hand.
"You've got to keep your worms warm."
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Q: What's the difference between hockey player and hippie girl?
A: Hockey player will take shower after 3 periods.
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Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise!
There was a terrible tragedy concerning the local ice hockey team.
They drowned during spring training.
It's Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at center ice.
He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty.
He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there.
"No" says the neighbor.
"The seat is empty."
"This is incredible," said the man.
"Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Stanley Cup and not use it?"
The neighbor says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me.
I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away.
This is the first Stanley Cup we haven't been to together since we got married."
"Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that.
That's terrible... But couldn't you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?"
The man shakes his head. "No,” he says. “They're all at the funeral."
Chuck Norris became famous when he coached the American rugby and America won the fifa world cup.
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Q: How does Mike Tyson differ from Metallica?
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Tyson leaves your ear in a ring.
Q: What do you call black people in a swimming pool?
A: Coco puffs.
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A: Reeces puffs reeces puffs!
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Chuck Norris once scored a field goal, using a hockey stick!
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What do you call an elephant that lies across the middle of a tennis court?
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What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench?
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