Joke #3476

Q: How does a blonde like her eggs? A: Unfertilized.
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has 22.36 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: blonde

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An old man asks a blond: If a guy would try to rape you, will you scream for help? If he can’t manage me by himself off course!
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has 27.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: blonde
What is the best blonde secretary in the world to have? One that never misses a period.
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: blonde
How can you tell if a blonde’s been using the computer? There’s whiteout on the screen. How can you tell if two blondes have been using the computer? There’s writing on the whiteout.
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has 26.16 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: blonde
My blonde girlfriend went to the doctors this morning and was told she had two weeks to live. She chose last week and this week.
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has 69.85 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: blonde, death, life, stupid, time
There was a burning building with a redhead, a brunette, and a blonde at the top. The firemen are yelling to the redhead to jump into a blanket and she jumps off the building and right as she was about to safely hit the blanket they moved it and she dies. They yell to the brunette to jump but she says,"No I saw what you did to the redhead"! They shout we don't like redheads! So the brunette jumps and sure enough they move the blanket and she dies. Then they shout to the blonde to jump off into the blanket. But the blonde says,"no I saw what you did to them"! They shout we don't like them! The blonde then says, "I don't trust you guys, put the blanket on the ground and step back!"
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has 51.61 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job. In the first room, she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out “green side up!” In the second room, she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow. He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled “green side up!” The lady was somewhat curious, but she said nothing. In the third room, she said she would like it painted a warm rose color. The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled “green side up!” The lady then asked him, “Why do you keep yelling ‘green side up’?” “I’m sorry,” came the reply. “But I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street.
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has 39.47 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: blonde, work
Q: What do you call an eternity? A: Four Blondes in four cars at a four way stop.
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has 31.97 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: What is long and hard to a blonde? A: Fourth grade.
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has 42.06 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: blonde, school
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."
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has 61.89 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A married couple go to a restaurant. A blonde waitress takes their order and returns several minutes later, carrying a plate with only a plain hamburger bun on it. The man asks, "Where's the burger?" The waitress lifts her arm and pulls out a burger from her armpit. "I was keeping it warm," she replies. The wife says, "Please cancel my hot dog order."
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has 46.28 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: blonde, disgusting, dog, food, marriage