Joke #3609

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house. A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox and again opened it, and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is!" My stupid computer keeps saying, "You've got mail!"
Vote: has 43.21 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A blonde finds a lamp with a genie inside. He says, "I will grant you three wishes." The blonde says, "For my first wish, I want my love handles to disappear." The genie replies, "Your wish is my command." Suddenly, the blonde exclaims, "Holy sh*t! What did you do with my ears?"
Vote: has 54.97 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde
After losing his fortune, a Texas oilman decided to spend his last twenty bucks at a whorehouse. He entered and promptly went up to the Madam and asked her what he could get for $20. The Madam gave him a lengthy stare and told him to go upstairs, last door on the left. He proceeded to march up the stairs and entered the room. To his shock and pleasure he saw a beautiful blonde waiting naked on the bed. So he tore off his clothes and jumped on and started pumping away for dear life. Upon orgasm he noticed that stuff started oozing out of her eyeballs. He runs down to the Madam to report this and she looks at him turns around and yells, "Hey Charlie....... The dead one's full again!"
Vote: has 63.81 % from 74 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, money, beauty, blonde, life
A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!" The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!" Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator. Later in the day, the shopkeeper was driving home, when he spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he saw a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She took aim, killed the creature, and with a great deal of effort hauled it on to the swamp bank. Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watched in amazement. Just then the blonde flipped the alligator on its back, and frustrated, shouts out, "Damn it, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!"
Vote: has 58.56 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde
A blond smokes in her yard. The garbage man asks her: Any garbage today? Yes, tree sacks please...
Vote: has 14.16 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde
Q. Why don't blondes eat Jello? A. They can't figure out how to get two cups of water into those little packages.
Vote: has 26.98 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, food
Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, “Those are deer tracks.” The second blonde said, “No those are elk tracks.” The third blonde said, “You’re both wrong, those are moose tracks.” The blondes were still arguing when the train hit them. Emma: So, what kind of tracks were they?
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, animal
There's a blonde. She enters a laughing contest. There's 10 levels to the contest. She gets to the 9th level and bursts into laughter. The host asks her "Why did you laugh, you could have won." The blonde reply's, "I finally got the first joke."
Vote: has 51.61 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde
What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back!
Vote: has 26.98 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde
Why does a blonde have an IQ 1 point higher than a policehorse? So she won't shit on the street during a parade.
Vote: has 31.97 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, cop
Q: What did the blonde say when she tried driving stick for the first time? A: "How do you shift this thing?" (you make jacking off motions).
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde