There's two fish in a tank, and one says ''How do you drive this thing?''
Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'" Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken." Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?" Mother: "Because we need the eggs."
Why is it difficult to identify horses from the back? They re always switching their tails.
Which rabbit stole from the rich to give to the poor? Rabbit Hood.
Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were having a conversation one fine Sunday evening. One remarked to the other, ‘I got a new hearing device and it works fine?' The second said, ‘oh yes, my grandchildren just love the gifts of my choice.' The third one who noticed the hearing device in the ear of the first one asked, what kind is it?' The one with the brand new hearing device answered ‘about 6 O'clock'. All three of them looked up in the birds in the sky and said, "Birds of the same feather ‘flock' together."
What do you call a bear with no teeth, a gummy bear!
First Caribou: What kind of math do owls like? Second Caribou: Owlgebra.
Why is a bunny the luckiest animal in the world? It has 4 rabbits feet.
A turtle was walking down an alley in New York when he was mugged by a gang of snails. A police detective came to investigate and asked the turtle if he could explain what happened. The turtle looked at the detective with a confused look on his face and replied "I don't know, it all happened so fast."
What do you call a dinosaur with magic powers? Tyrannosaurus Hex.
How do you tell if a black girls pregnant? Shove a banana up her vagina and if you pull it out half eaten then you got a monkey on the way.