Joke #3639

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

They put one man on the moon. Why can’t they put them all there?

Why does the stupid man put ice in his condom? To keep the swelling down.

A man went into the drugstore and asked for a deodorant. "The ball type?" asked the clerk. "No," said the dumb man. "It's for my underarms."

What did Barack Obama become after his forty-seventh year? "Forty-eight years old."

How do you know a man is really a bad dancer? When he can still step on Dolly Parton's toes.

Why did the blonde have a sore belly button? Because there are blonde men too!

A man in a pub asks for a beer. The barman says, "Sure, that'll be one dollar." "One dollar?" exclaims the man. Reading the menu, he says, "Could I have steak and chips?" "Certainly," says the barman, "that'll be two dollars." "Two dollars?" cries the man. "You're joking. Where's the guy who owns this place?" The barman says, "Upstairs, with my wife"." The man says, "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?" The barman says, "The same thing I'm doing to his business."

Man to a woman: "Do you know the difference between a blowjob and a cheeseburger is?" Woman: "No." Man: "Lets have lunch sometime…"

I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.

Confucius say, man who fart in church sit in own pew.