Chuck Norris does not sleep.
He waits.
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Chuck Norris can remember the future.
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Chuck Norris can light ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At Night.
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The speed of light was instituted because Chuck Norris didn't want get winded outrunning it.
Chuck Norris hates to sweat.
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Chuck Norris traveled around the world in 60 milliseconds.
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Chuck Norris has walked to the end of the universe and back.
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When you google up Chuck Norris, he googles you back for revenge.
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When Chuck Norris kills time, that'll be the end of it.
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Chuck Norris doesn't chew gum.
Chuck Norris chews tin foil.
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Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.
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Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack.
His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
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