What to polar bears eat for lunch?
(Ice berg-ers!)
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Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Owls say.
Owls say who?
Yep, that they do.
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Q: What goes "oom... oom"?
A: A cow walking backward!
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The Teacher asked Little Johnny,
"How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?"
Little Johnny replied, "Just Don't bite any."
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A panda bear walks into a restaurant and orders a sandwich.
When he receives the sandwich he eats it and then shoots the waiter and leaves the restaurant.
A policeman sees the panda and tells him he just broke the law.
The panda bear tells the policeman that he's innocent and, if he didn't believe him, to look in the dictionary.
The policeman gets a dictionary and looks up "panda bear."
It says, "Panda Bear: eats shoots and leaves."
How can you tell which rabbits are the oldest in a group?
Look for gray hares.
Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'"
Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken."
Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?"
Mother: "Because we need the eggs."
The mouse and the elephant stay on the trunk of a smitten tree.
Near them passes the giraffe, who asks them:
Who pulled out this tree from his root?
Me off course, says the mouse, but the elephant helped a bit.
I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah; I thought, ''He's trying to pull a fast one''.
Q.How do you catch a polar bear?
A.You cut a hole in the ice and you put peas all round the edge and when the polar bear comes along and stops for a pea,you kick it in the ice hole.