Jane. ‘It didn’t work for us.’ ‘Of course it wouldn’t,’ replies Mary. ‘You have to go alone.’
Worst way to ask for anal: "Aww come on...I bet my dick is tiny compared to some of the shits you've taken!"
Yo mama's so fat when she is having sex, her partner doesen't know if it's in her butt or her boobs.
Q: How do you find a blind man at a nude beach? A: It’s not hard.
What happened when the chef got his hand caught in the dishwasher? They both got fired.
Kissing is a habit Fucking is a game Guys get all the pleasure Girls get all the pain The guy says I love you You believe its true But when your tummy starts to swell, He says 'to hell with you' 10 minutes of pleasure 9 months in pain 3 days in hospital A baby without a name The baby is a bastard The mother is a whore This never wouldn't have happened If the rubber wouldn't have torn
A couple have been dating for a few weeks, but the guy has been afraid of making advances because he thinks his penis is on the small side. Finally, he gets up his courage and takes her down lovers’ lane. While they’re kissing, he opens his trouser zip and guides her hand onto his organ. ‘No thanks,’ says the girl. ‘I don’t smoke.’
There is nothing wrong with sex on TV – as long as you don’t fall off.
Why is sex like a game of bridge? You don’t need a partner if you’ve got a good hand.
‘I’m a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping Tom booing me.’ Rodney Dangerfield
She was hungry for love and didn’t know where her next male was coming from.