What did the idiot call his pet zebra?
Spot!
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What do you call an ugly rabbit that sits on someone's forehead?
Unsightly facial hare.
What is the most important use for cowhide?
To hold the cow together.
What do you call the reindeer with one eye higher than the other?
Isaiah.
An eagle swoops down from the sky and eats a mouse.
Three hours later, while the eagle is flying, the mouse sticks its head out of the eagle's butt and asks, "How high up are we?"
"About 2,000 feet," the eagle replies.
The mouse replies, "You ain't sh*ttin' me, are you?"
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A Bosnian catches a goldfish.
The goldfish says: "Let me go and I will grant you one wish."
The Bosnian says: "No way, I'll take you to the pawn shop – gold is gold."
What's a moo hoo for the sound you hear when a cow spits?
A cud thud.
Chuck Norris eats gummy bears and shits out grizzly bears.
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Two Rabbits are running from a group of foxes.
They hide in a pile of hay, one rabbit says to the other one "Ok we can run for it or we can stay here and out number them."
And the other rabbit says, "We're going to run for it you idiot I'm your brother."
Q: What do you get when you cross donkey DNA with an onion?
A: A piece of ass that will bring tears to your eyes.