What is a zebra?
26 sizes larger than an ‘A’ bra.
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Why didn’t the internet get any e-mail?
Because his e-dog kept chasing the e-postman.
What do you call it when one bull spies on another bull?
A steak-out.
Did you hear about the snobby cow?
She thought she was a cutlet above the rest.
Q: Why don't seagulls fly over the bay?
A: Because then they'd be bay gulls.
Why did President Clinton name his dog Buddy instead of Spot?
Because he didn't want people running around the White House saying, "come Spot, come Spot!"
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Why are cows made for dancing?
They re all born hoofers.
I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah; I thought, ''He's trying to pull a fast one''.
Why was the racehorse named Bad News?
Because bad news travels fast!
Mr. Bear and Mr. Rabbit live in the same forest, but they don't like each other.
One day, they come across a golden frog who offers them three wishes each.
Mr. Bear wishes that all the other bears in the forest were female. Mr. Rabbit wishes for a crash helmet.
Mr. Bear's second wish is that all the bears in the neighboring forests were female as well. Mr. Rabbit wishes for a motorcycle.
Mr. Bear's final wish is that all the other bears in the world were female, leaving him the only male bear in the world.
Mr. Rabbit revs the engine of his motorcycle and says, "I wish that Mr. Bear was gay!" and rides off.
A mouse and an elephant are walking through the forest.
The elephant falls in a hole so the mouse gets his Porsche throws a rope down into the hole and pulls the elephant out.
So they continue walking and the mouse falls into a hole.
The elephant throws his dick into the hole and the mouse climbs out.
Moral of the story: if you have a big enough dick you don't need a Porsche.