Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground.
Chuck Norris can run so fast he can cause time travel.
If it looks like chicken tastes like chicken and smells like chicken and Chuck Norris says it's beef then it's beef.
Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.
Chuck Norris is so tough, that he doesn't get a workout from the weights,they get a workout from him.
Chuck Norris once kicked Hulk in the face, so Hulk ran into the woods. He is now known as Shrek.
Chuck Norris doesen't fly, gravity collapses around him.
Every phobia known to man has a phobia of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can play a whole note in 3/4 time.
Once Chuck Norris met a man on a horse that he did'nt like, now we know him as the headless horseman.
Chuck Norris makes his own Girl Scout cookies using real Girl Scouts.