Joke #3909

What happened when the chef got his hand caught in the dishwasher? They both got fired.
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has 50.76 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: sex

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Hung Chow calls in to work and says, "Hey, boss I not come work today, I really sick. I got headache, stomach ache and my legs hurt. I not come work." The boss says, "You know Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel like this I go to my wife and tell her give me sex. Makes everything better and I can go to work. You try." Two hours later Hung Chow calls again: "Boss, I do what you say and I feel great. I be at work soon. You got nice house."
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has 84.91 % from 3635 votes. More jokes about: health, sex, wife, work
An old lady went to visit her dentist. When it was her turn she sat in the chair, lowered her underpants and raised her legs. The dentist said: "Excuse me; I 'm not a gynecologist." "I know," said the old lady "I want you to take my husband's teeth out."
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has 71.25 % from 146 votes. More jokes about: dentist, dirty, husband, old people, sex
Q: What have condoms and tires in common? A: Good year.
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has 40.46 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: sex
A man and his wife went to the pharmacy to pick up his prescription for Viagra. Seeing the $10 per pill price his wife was astonished - but then realized "it's only going to cost us $30 per year."
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has 72.05 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: marriage, medical, money, sex, viagra
How can you make your wife scream for an hour after sex? Wipe your dick on the curtains.
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has 77.73 % from 567 votes. More jokes about: sex
I’m not cheap, but I am on special this week.
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has 27.09 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: sex
"I just had sexed in school today, dad! You lied to me! You told me if I have sex before my 16th biurthday, my boyfriend will die." "Oh, he will, sweetheart, he will."
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has 68.77 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: age, birthday, dad, kids, sex
A white guy walks into a bar and asked a black guy for a bl*w job. The black guy beat him up and threw him out of the bar. The bartender then asked, "What did he say to you? The black guy responded I don't know all I heard is something about a job!!
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has 63.43 % from 617 votes. More jokes about: bar, bartender, black people, sex, work
How do you know if your wife wears tights in bed? Her toes curl up when you screw her.
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has 42.33 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: sex
An apple, a banana and a penis got into an argument one day. The apple says sadly "I have the worst life ever. People take one bite of me and throw me on the ground." The banana says "You think thats bad? People take off my clothes, eat my insides and leave my clothes on the floor." The penis laughs. "You guys have it easy. You try having people sticking you in dark, wet caves, putting bags over your head, messaging you for hours and making you do push-ups until you throw up!"
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has 76.07 % from 491 votes. More jokes about: dirty, food, sex