While giving a physical, a doctor notices that his patient’s shins are covered in dark, savage bruises.
‘Tell me,’ says the doctor.
‘Do you play hockey or soccer?’
‘No,’ said the man. ‘But my wife and I play bridge.’
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits.
He said, "How flexible are you?"
I said, "I can't make Tuesdays or Thursdays."
What’s a swimmer’s favourite sport?
Pool.
You: "I'm only 35, I have my whole life ahead of me."
Sports Broadcaster: "Here comes the oldest player in the league. He's 32. A miracle."
Q: What did the basketball say when he got deflated?
A: "Oh balls."
Vote:
The secret of good golf is to hit the ball hard, straight and not too often.
A woman goes into a sporting goods store to buy a rifle. "It`s for my husband," she tells the clerk.
"Did he tell you what gauge to get?" asked the clerk.
"Are you kidding?" she says.
"He doesn`t even know that I`m going to shoot him!"
What’s the difference between England and a tea bag?
The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
Basketball
Yo mama so fat when she was swimming in the ocean the indians claimed her as the new land.
The Winter Olympics.
Letting white people win at sports no one else can afford to learn.
Vote: