When you get to the point where you really understand your computer, it’s probably obsolete.
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Error, no keyboard.
Press F1 to continue.
Why did Steve Jobs live his last moments in regret?
They say your life flashes before your eyes just before you die.
Unfortunately for Steve Jobs, his iPhone 4S didn't have a Flash player installed!
Girlfriend pregnant error... Abort, Marry, Ignore?
A programmer had a problem.
He decided to use Java.
He now has a ProblemFactory.
I have a statistics joke, but it's not significant.
I have a regression joke, but it sounds quite mean.
I have a machine learning joke, but it is not performing as well on a new audience.
I have a joke about deep learning but I can't explain it.
I have a geography joke, but I don't know where it is.
Q: What do you call an accountant without a spreadsheet?
A: Lost.
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Chuck Norris's programs can pass the Turing Test by staring at the interrogator.
"Knock, knock.Who's there?"
very long pause...
"Java."
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While my brother-in-law was tapping away on his home computer, his ten-year-old daughter sneaked up behind him.
Then she turned and ran into the kitchen, squealing to the rest of the family: "I know Daddy's password! I know Daddy's password!"
"What is it?" her sisters asked eagerly.
Proudly she replied: "Asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, asterisk!"
Did you hear about the music app that is preloaded on every iPhone 6 plus?
GarageBend.
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