Joke #4081

A couple have just had sex. The woman says, ‘If I got pregnant, what would we call the baby?’ The man takes off his condom, ties a knot in it, and flushes it down the toilet. ‘Well,’ he says. ‘If he can get out of that, we’ll call him Houdini.’
Vote: has 78.38 % from 485 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

How can you tell if a blonde is having a bad day? Her tampon is behind her ear and she can’t find her pencil.
Vote: has 53.05 % from 58 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Q:Why do women like to have sex with the lights off? A:They can't stand to see a man have a good time!
Vote: has 51.81 % from 54 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
My girlfriend used to give amazing blow jobs, but lately they haven't been so great - they are starting to hurt me now since her baby teeth started growing in.
Vote: has 25.65 % from 252 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
A little boy walks into his parents' room to see his mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down. The mom sees her son and quickly dismounts, worried about what her son has seen. She dresses quickly and goes to find him. The son sees his mom and asks, "What were you and Dad doing?" The mother replies, "Well you know your dad has a big tummy and sometimes I have to get on top of it to help flatten it." "You're wasting your time," said the boy. "Why is that?" asked his mom, puzzled. "Well when you go shopping the lady next door comes over and gets on her knees and blows it right back up."
Vote: has 88.45 % from 2505 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
She’s got her very own method of birth control. She takes her make-up off.
Vote: has 46.77 % from 65 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
There are three moms. A Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde. They were all talking one day and the brunette says "Oh my gosh y'all I went through my daughter's purse the other day to get some gum, and I found an ounce of weed. I cannot believe she smokes weed" They comfort her, and the redhead says "Yeah, well I found a fake I. D. In my daughter's purse. I cannot believe she has one". So they all comfort her. Then the blonde says "That's nothing. I found a condom in my daughter's purse. I just cannot believe she has a penis"
Vote: has 57.16 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, ginger, sex, stupid, weed
What is a man's idea of foreplay? A half hour of begging.
Vote: has 64.88 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men, sex
Why are black peoples eyes red after sex? Pepper spray.
Vote: has 72.96 % from 294 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: racist, sex, black people
What is 6.9? A great thing ruined by a period.
Vote: has 77.74 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math, sex
A ship goes out to sea and crashes. 6 people (1 woman and 5 men) survive and use a safety raft to float to this deserted island. Well, after spending several weeks on the island, they all begin to get really lonely and sexually deprived. So they come to this agreement. All of the men will marry the one woman for a week. So the first man has her for one week, the second man has her for the second week, and so on. Everyone will now be getting sex and they all agree to it. This goes on for five years and everyone is happy. Each man gets sex every fifth week and the woman gets to have sex whenever she wants with a different man every week. Well, a few weeks into the fifth year, the woman dies. The first week is pretty bad, the second week is still pretty bad, the third week is getting worse, the fourth week things are just bad, real bad, and the fifth week is just awful. It’s getting so very bad that on the sixth week they buried her.
Vote: has 79.04 % from 511 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, desert island, death, sex, marriage