I tried some of that aphrodisiac rhino horn. Now I’ve got an overwhelming desire to charge at Land Rovers.
There is nothing wrong with sex on TV – as long as you don’t fall off.
Q:What's the worst thing your wife can say during sex? A:Honey I'm home.
‘Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.’ Rodney Dangerfield
The ladies say I'm like Usain Bolt in the bedroom... I usually wear a yellow and green vest.
A Girl was towelling her wet pussy. She enjoyed it so much that she began to rub it vigorously until... ...the pussy cried "Meow" and runs away. Moral Lessons 1. Be kind to Animals 2. Always keep your thoughts clean...
Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
Two hookers standing on a street corner started discussing business. One of the hookers said, "Gonna be a good night, I smell cock in the air." The other hooker looked at her and said, "Sorry No, I just burped."
Q: Why did the gay man take two aspirin with his Viagra? A: So sex wouldn't be such a pain in the arse.
She was hungry for love and didn’t know where her next male was coming from.
Peter: "Your secretary is very sexy..." Tony: "Thanks! It's a robot actually, named 'Maria'. If you squeeze her right boob, she takes dictation & if you squeeze her left boob, she types letters! I'll Lend it to you for a day & you can see her functions..." Next day Peter called Tony from hospital & shouted: "You bastard!" You didn't tell me that the "HOLE" between Maria's legs is a pencil sharpener.