Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
Chuck Norris can finish Sims.
Chuck Norris has never won a single fight. Winning would imply some sort of competition or chance that he could loose.
The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
Chuck Norris can over rev a revolver.
Chuck Norris hates both the player and the game.
Chuck Norris can unlock a hairpin with a door.
James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator. However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can swim and skydive at the same time.
The reason everything is better in Texas is because Chuck Norris said so.