If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results.
It just doesn't happen.
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A few guys tried to follow Chuck Norris during a light workout while he was vacationing in Hawaii. It's now called the Ironman Triathlon.
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Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards.
Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.
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Willy Wonka gave an everlasting gobstopper to Chuck Norris.
The flavor lasted 2.3 seconds.
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Chuck Norris can make you laugh at your own funeral.
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Chuck Norris is the only one that can turn lemonade into lemons.
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Chuck Norris doesn't age, he levels up!
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Chuck Norris can make ice cubes with a microwave.
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Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child.
The bed went itself out of fear.
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Chuck Norris only created Russians so he can use them to take over TGI Fridays.
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Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as "You Know Who."
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