Joke #4529

Harry’s so cheap, he didn’t buy his wife a pearl necklace, he got her a length of string and told her to start a collection.
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has 19.23 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: money

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All I ask for is the opportunity to prove that money doesn’t buy happiness...All most people want is a chance to prove money can’t make them happy.
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has 46.10 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: money
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asked a young Engineer fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were you looking for?" The Engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer enquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years say, a red Corvette?" The Engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?" And the interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it."
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has 85.11 % from 311 votes. More jokes about: IT, money, office, work
He was so mean he had the house sound-proofed so the children wouldn’t be able to hear the ice cream van.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: money
Q: Where does a snowman keep his money? A: In a snow bank.
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has 56.75 % from 92 votes. More jokes about: money, winter
Hey, you wanna do a 68? You go down on me, and I'll owe you one.
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has 65.63 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: age, dirty, flirt, money, sex
A blonde was trying to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had almost 230,000 miles on it. One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon. The brunette told her, “There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it’s not legal.” “That doesn’t matter,” replied the blonde, “if I can only sell the car.” “Okay,” said the brunette. “Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will ‘fix it’. Then you shouldn’t have a problem anymore trying to sell your car.” The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic. About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, “Did you sell your car?” “No,” replied the blonde, “Why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it!”
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has 65.57 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, money, stupid
Well goodnight everyone. I have to get up early tomorrow to do nothing and still make more money than all of you!
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has 19.74 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: money, political, republican
Why is money called dough? Because we all knead it!
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has 24.28 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: money
Deciding to take up jogging, the middle-aged man was astounded by the wide selection of jogging shoes available at the local sports shoe store. While trying on a basic pair of jogging shoe, he noticed a minor feature and asked the clerk about it. “What’s this little pocket thing here on the side for?” “Oh, that’s to carry spare change so you can call your wife to come pick you up when you’ve jogged too far.”
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has 51.70 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: age, health, money, old people, wife
An old miser comes into the bank with a huge bag of coins. ‘Gracious,’ says the bank teller. ‘Did you hoard all that yourself?’ ‘No,’ replies the miser. ‘My sister whored most of it.’
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: money