Joke #4567

Yesterday I saw a man trying to chat up a cheetah. ‘Hello,’ I thought. ‘He’s trying to pull a fast one.’

Who held the baby octopus to ransom? Squidnappers.

A mother and baby camel are talking one day when the baby camel asks, "Mom why have I got these huge three-toed feet?" The mother replies, "Well son, when we trek across the desert your toes will help you to stay on top of the soft sand." "Okay," said the son. A few minutes later the son asks, "Mom, why have I got these great long eyelashes?" "They are there to keep the sand out of your eyes on the trips through the desert," "Thanks Mom," replies the son. After a short while, the son returns and asks, "Mom, why have I got these great big humps on my back?" The mother, now a little impatient with the boy replies, "They are there to help us store fat for our long treks across the desert, so we can go without water for long periods." "That's great mom, so we have huge feet to stop us sinking, and long eyelashes to keep the sand from our eyes and these humps to store water, but Mom ..." "Yes son?" "What good does all that do us here in the San Diego Zoo?"

Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Megasoreass.

How did the farmer find his lost cow? He tractor down.

Which rabbit is a famous comedian? Bob Hop.

A deer hunter who was an atheist was out in the woods when suddenly a 1,000-pound deer stepped out. "Good God!" exclaimed the hunter. Suddenly, a voice from Heaven said, "I thought you don't believe in me." The hunter replied, "Up until now I didn't believe in 1,000-pound deer either."

What do you call a gigantic polar bear? Nothing, you just run away.

Q: What does a cow make when the sun comes out? A: A shadow.

That tornado damage your cow barn any? Dunno. Haven't found the durn thing yet.

Did you hear about the new shark food restaurant called Jaws? It costs an arm and a leg to eat there.