What are cat-erpillars afraid of?
Dog-erpillars.
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What do you call a grizzly bear caught in the rain?
(A drizzly bear!)
How much do I owe Yo' Mama?
My dog came home happy last night.
A man asks a farmer near a field, "Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train."
The farmer says, "Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you'll even catch the 4:11 one."
What's a rabbits favorite TV show?
Hoppy Days.
What did the dog say to the hot dog bun?
"Are you pure bred?"
A baby hedgehog lost itself, in the garden.
Sad, he strolls from here to there, whereupon he bumps in a cactus and full of hope he says:
Mama, is that you?
What's green and red?
A very mad frog.
Chuck Norris was once bitten by a venomous cobra ....
After 5 days of excrutiating pain the cobra
Eventually died
Vote:
What is the definition of "derange"?
De place where de cowboys ride.
There is a lady laying in bed.
At about midnight her husband comes walking in with a sheep under his arm and says ”That’s the fat pig I’ve been sleeping with when I’m not sleeping with you.”
His wife gets a confused look on her face and states ”but honey that’s not a pig its a sheep.”
Her husband says ”Shut up pig I’m talking to the sheep!”