There is no logical foundation of mathematics, and Gödel has proved it!
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The square root of Pain is Chuck Norris.
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Q: Why can't a blonde dial 911?
A: Because she couldn't find the 11
Q: What should you put on the tomb stone of a mathematician?
A: He didn't count with this...
If I had only one day left to live, I would live it in my math class: it would seem so much longer.
Two random variables were talking in a bar.
They thought they were being discrete but I heard their chatter continuously.
Chuck Norris is the only person to know pi, because when he puts it into the calculator, the calculator doesn't dare give him only part of it.
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Three statisticians go out hunting together.
After a while they spot a solitary rabbit.
The first statistician takes aim and overshoots.
The second aims and undershoots.
The third shouts out "We got him!"
Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?"
"None," replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away."
"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you're thinking."
Little Johnny says, "I have a question for you. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?"
"Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone."
"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking."
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