Joke #4827

Q: What did the bird say after his cage fell apart? A: "Cheap, cheap!"
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has 25.64 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal

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Why couldnt the teddy bear eat any more thanksgiving dinner? He was already stuffed!
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A man takes his wife to the stock show. They start heading down the alley that had the bulls. They come up to the first bull and his sign stated: “This bull mated 50 times last year.” The wife turns to her husband and says, “He mated 50 times in a year, you could learn from him.” They proceed to the next bull and his sign stated: “This bull mated 65 times last year.” The wife turns to her husband and says, “This one mated 65 times last year. That is over 5 times a month. You can learn from this one, also.” They proceeded to the last bull and his sign said: “This bull mated 365 times last year.” The wife’s mouth drops open and says, “WOW! He mated 365 times last year. That is ONCE A DAY! You could really learn from this one.” The man turns to his wife and says, “Go up and see if it was 365 times with the same cow.”
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has 82.48 % from 159 votes. More jokes about: animal, time, wife
What do you if you're trapped inside a whale? Run round and round till you're all pooped out!
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has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting
Why did the frog cross the road? To see what the chicken was doing.
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has 39.90 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: animal
A family of tortoises went into a cafe for some ice cream. They sat down and were about to start when Father Tortoise said, "I think it's going to rain. Junior, will you pop home and fetch my umbrella?" So off went junior for Father's umbrella, but three days later he still hadn't returned. "I think, dear," said Mother Tortoise to Father Tortoise, "that we had better eat junior's ice cream before it melts." And a voice from the door said, "If you do that I won't go."
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has 56.84 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, weather
An octopus walks into a bar and sees a band playing in the corner, composed of those bar-room heroes, the Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman. He walks up and says “I’m the best musician in the world. I can play any instrument you like”. So the English guy goes “Alright then. Play this” and hands him a guitar. The octopus plays it better than Jimi Hendrix, better than Chuck Berry, better than anyone and hands him back the guitar. The Irishman says “Okay, how about this?” and shows him to the piano. The octopus sits down and plays it like never before – Better than Jerry Lee Lewis and Elton John. The best pianist ever. Finally, a Scotsman says “Alright, let’s see ya play this then” and hands him a set of bagpipes. The octopus looks at them and fumbles with them. Couple more minutes and he’s still struggling and there’s no sound coming out. Couple more minutes and still nothing so the Scotsman says “Oh, so can you not play it then?” And the octopus says “Play it? I’m gonna f*ck her when I get her pyjamas off”
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has 80.42 % from 81 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar
Did you hear about the argumentative skunk? He always liked to make a stink.
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
Why are cows made for dancing? They re all born hoofers.
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How did the rabbit become a wrestling champion? It had a lot of hare pins.
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Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
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has 32.47 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, horse