Joke #5128

Q. How do men define a long-term relationship? A. A second date.
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has 34.78 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: men

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What should you give a man who has everything? A. A woman to show him how to work it. B. Penicillin.
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has 24.15 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: men, women, work
Q: There is a $100 bill sitting in the middle of a 4 way intersection, at one side there is a man hating dike, at another side, there is Santa, at another side there is the Easter Bunny, and at the las side there is a man loving lesbian. Who gets the $100 bill? A: The man hating dike because all others are a figure of your imagination.
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has 45.89 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: easter, life, men, money, Santa
Do you know why men have holes in the end of their penises? So oxygen can get into their brains.
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has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: men
Bob saw his doctor and asked if he had ever laughed at a patient. "In over 20 years I haven't because I try to remain professional." With that Bob dropped his trousers revealing the tiniest dick the doctor had ever seen. It wasn't any bigger than a AAA battery. The doctor burst into uncontrolable hysteria. "I'm sorry I really am, I don't know what came over me, I promise it won't happen again. Now what seems to be the problem?" "It's swollen" said Bob.
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has 80.48 % from 577 votes. More jokes about: doctor, men
What do you call a woman that works like a man?? Lazy.
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has 39.47 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: men
Why does it take 100 million sperm to fertilize one egg? Because not one will stop and ask for directions.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: men
A couple was having an argument, and the man was losing badly. After 5 minutes the woman won the argument proving the man to be stupid, the man sadly says "If my proof falls then I rome through the halls." Then the woman leaves for 10 minutes and comes back starts giving him a blowjob. The man is confused and says "what are you doing?" She said "If I prove you dumb I give ya some." The man continues to lose a argument knowing he will get a blowjob after 10 minutes, and he did. Years later they have a kid but none of them want him so they have an argument of who takes care of it and the other leaves for good. The man without a thought loses the argument the get another blowjob, but after the argument the woman starts rapping "Yo yo guess who's the kid, not me so suck yourself bitch." Before she leaves the he says "what about the blowjob?" She says ask my twin sister that has herpes cause she did it the whole time.
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has 32.38 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: couple, dirty, men, stupid, women
What does a man consider a seven course meal? A hot dog and a six pack.
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has 36.09 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: men
Chinese and American are in a plane. Suddenly, Chinese puts his shoes off and American is angry. After some time, he goes to buy a coke, but Chinese says that he'll do it. While he's gone, American spits into his shoes. Chinese gets back and American drinks his coke. That repeats a couple of times,and after the flight American admits, "I spitted in your shoes, sorry." Chinese answers, "That's how we do it. We spit in each others shoes, we piss into each others cokes..."
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: men
(A) You are not Tom Cruise, (B) The guns may stop working at the last moment, (C) The Enemy is 1000 times intelligent than you, (D) Your family might not like the amount of compensation on your behalf (E) Just remember, "the safest way to win over your enemies is by making them your friends!"
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has 17.81 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, family, friendship, men, work