Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
Justin Beiber screeched like a high-pitched girl the time he saw Chuck Norris. His voice is still up there today.
Chuck Norris once made an omelette from a Fabergé egg.
Teacher to student "Why is every answer on your test 'Chuck Norris'?" Student to teacher "Chuck Norris is the answer to all problems!"
For Chuck Norris, there is no such thing as gambling. He already knows the outcome.
Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Chuck Norris to go around.
Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
Voldemort once ran into Chuck Norris. He is now known as Harry Potter.
Chuck Norris doesn't ask, "who's your daddy?" Chuck Norris is your daddy.
Scientis cannot figure out where Atlantis is... Chuck Norris owns a villa there.
Everyone knows Chuck Norris' pet rock... he named it "Earth."